for new widows/widowers and those on the journey of grief

Graphics Web Design & Open University |"Two & Three Years On" | Beauty From Ashes | Links

Two & three years on

Most of this site was written around one year after my husband's death.

Two years on it is different now, we have moved on.

Our home at times is filled with hearty laughter from our two girls, now age 11 and 13.

I have just found myself coming through another time of pure grief and tears.

I am surprised that I have felt so bad and didn't think I had any tears left.

'God counts our tears' ~ He will have been busy counting mine this past month.

However I look forward to being inspired by my own site ... and ... I have ...,

visiting my Links already provided and adding some new pages.

No doubt there will be much to inspire on this page too.

 

I have visited Jennifer Larcombe's book again "Beauty from the Ashes"

and on my journey I am somewhere towards the end of her book ~ we have moved on from those raw beginnings.

I look forward to reinvesting myself in life to finding joy again.

 

At my lowest moments I have found help from people sent into my life at real times of need.

I found this poem of inspiration just now:

The Miracles of Grace

Pondering Moments
John Boyles

People enter our lives for many
different reasons.
Maybe if we take the time to understand
one another,
we might find a resolution in fulfilling
our own responsibilities.
We, ourselves, feel the pain and suffering
of disheartened souls.
People have trouble with their daily lives
and require a subtle approach.
Be conscious and mindful of the struggles
and grievances they hide within.
Humility and courage come from the heart
and lead to a living soul.
We, the caregivers, possess peace and love
and offer a true sincerity to God's mercy.
In the gift of salvation we embrace with
prayer the miracles of grace

How true this is now facing Christmas 2004 alone again.

Just met a dear friend Karen when I was out at the supermarket,

she is one of those special friends who has been praying for me with two friends,

now that is real friendship - and I thought I was so alone. Wow God is good.

Have just found Laurie-Ann Weis' web site Grief, Widowhood, Bereavement

April 2006 Laurie-Ann's book has written ... a book that others like us can turn to—like a quiet friend who understands ... a collection of personal experiences from widows and widowers from around the world, who share their grief and loss as they learn to move forward and reinvent their lives to discover hope and joy.

"The After Journey" can be ordered via Laurie-Ann's website

This is a site for inspiration especially for those in the first year of widowhood:

the stages of grief are so interchangeable relevant to all of us wherever we are on the journey of grief.

UCB continues to inspire me: the Word for Today has many gems of wisdom.

You can read 'Word for Today' online (set it as your Homepage!) or ask for your own copy to be sent to you.

There will be some of you reading this who have partners.

Although I no longer have a husband beside me,

I found this inspiring and thought provoking as we can take some of these

and use them with other special people in our lives,

in my case my children:

"TO THE MARRIED I GIVE THIS COMMAND" 1 CORINTHIANS 7:10 (NIV)

"50 tips for marriage"

(1) Start each day with a kiss. (2) Wear your wedding ring.

(3) Date your spouse at least once a week. (4) Accept your differences.

(5) Be polite. (6) Be gentle.

(7) Give gifts. (8) Smile often. (9) Touch.

(10) Talk about your dreams. (11) Select a song and make it ‘our song’.

(12) Give back rubs. (13) Laugh together. (14) Send a card for no reason.

(15) Do what the other person wants before they ask.

(16) Listen carefully. (17) Encourage each other. (18) Do it their way.

(19) Know their needs. (20) Fix their breakfast. (21) Compliment at least twice a day.

(22) Telephone during the day. (23) Slow down.

(24) Hold hands. (25) Cuddle. (26) Ask for the other’s opinion.

(27) Show respect. (28) Welcome each another home. (29) Try to look your best.

(30) Wink at each other. (31) Celebrate birthdays in a big way. (32) Apologise.

(33) Forgive quickly. (34) Set up a romantic get-away.

(35) Ask, ‘What can I do to make you happier?’ (36) Be positive. (37) Be kind.

(38) Be vulnerable. (39) Respond quickly to the other person’s requests.

(40) Talk about your love. (41) Reminisce about your favorite times together.

(42) Treat each other’s friends and relatives with courtesy.

(43) Send flowers every Valentine’s Day, anniversary and for no reason at all.

(44) Admit when you’re wrong. (45) Be sensitive to each other’s sexual desires.

(46) Seek outside help when needed. (47) Watch sunsets together.

(48) Say, ‘I love you’, frequently. (49) End the day with a hug. (50) Pray for each other daily.

 

Christmas 2004 I love Peggies place Peggy Bohannon's site and love to get her weekly newsletter.

Peggie gives so much inspiration to those who are looking for encouragement and help in times of need.

 

'Three years on'

March 2005

Recently I found myself at Church of God Glenmachan, Karen's church.

I was inspired by what I saw and heard.

The first thing that you notice is the positive energy charge

from the choir, the musicians, Pastor Jim and the congregation.

Visitors are made to feel most welcome

With the stress and depression of grieving I was caught up in a negative cycle

Joyce Meyer says she hates being around negative people - find some positive people to be around

I was drawn like a magnet to what was good for me

Richard Gunning RTU Ministries, preached on Divine Healing in January

and prayed for healing for depression

Since then I have felt totally different and able to cope

Find encouragement & inspiration from Joyce Meyer

Enjoying Everyday Life is on the GOD channel Sky TV at 8 a.m.: 2 p.m.: and 8 p.m. daily

Buy her tapes and teaching CDs and listen to them when you are driving

"Grief is the price we pay for love"

I began studying some years ago and graduated on May 21, 2005

I have now added BSc (Open) and Dip IT(Open) to my name.

Was thrilled to receive a letter from the Prince of Wales and the Duchess of Cornwall,

having sent them a card to wish them well on their recent wedding.

Knowing what it is like to be alone in this world I am happy that Prince Charles has the support of a dear wife beside him.

May 2005: One of the things that has helped me has been FlyLady

With grief and depression making housework difficult my house is full of clutter

 

March 2006: Delighted to say that FlyLady has been an inspiration to me,

my home is decluttered and redecorated, one room at a time.

Marla's commonsense approach can and will help you through

 

FLY Finally Loving Yourself takes baby steps for short times of fifteen minutes at a time to declutter and do housework

Fifiteen to twenty emails arrive each day to guide you through the process

When you look at the mountain of housework it is difficult to know where to begin

Have just bought a FlyLady timer which is really helpful

Your home is divided into 5 zones spread over each month with each week in one zone

This enables me to focus and take baby steps and not feel pressurized with all that has to be done

Need help with cooking try

Saving Dinner the Low-Carb Way

FlyLady help you cut the CHAOS Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome in your home

My mind is really being cleared with Marla's help to do my housework - it is one less thing to worry about

"I like to empower people." Marla says of her work. "It gives me a sense of accomplishment that I'm doing what God put me here to do. If I die today I'd die happy because I've done what I'm supposed to do." Lee Ann Bowman, Video on how to do FLY lady

Homepage | Poems | Raising Children & Teenagers | Alternative Treatments Cancer/Aloe Vera

Graphics Web Design & Open University |"Two & Three Years On" | Beauty From Ashes | Links

Updated: Sunday, June 11, 2006